Men Equating Fun as Sex
Everyone knows that when a guy writes in his profile that he wants some fun or he’s looking for a woman to have some fun with, that he’s not talking about concerts, plays, movies, conversation, going out to dinner, dancing or any of the like. More often than not, the male’s idea of fun in the personals is, of course, sex.
I really wish the guys would use a different word. So do other women that I have talked to who have all complained that fun does not automatically equal sex in their book. Which is not to confuse that sex can be fun, of course.
But I always try to be fair to the guys because after all, they are half of the population and their thoughts and feelings are almost just as important as our own. (wicked grin.) So I went and looked up what the American Heritage College Dictionary had to say about the word fun. Here’s their definition: “A source of amusement, enjoyment or pleasure.” Hmm. Well, then I guess I can see why the guys call it fun.
But what I don’t understand and what many other women also don’t understand is their ability to have fun with someone they don’t even know. I asked around of some men that I’ve come to know.
“In the personals when the guys say they want to have fun with a female, they really mean sex,” I said to each of them. “But how they can they have fun if they don’t even know the person who is lying underneath them? Why doesn’t it matter to so many of them?”
Truly some men think alike because of each man that I asked, every single one of them shrugged and said: “Guys are different. We don’t need to know the girl.”
“But why?” I persisted, not satisfied with this response. Nor was I happier with the next answer.
“It’s just a hole,” I was told.
Ouch. I stared at them each in silence for a moment. They all, individually, stared back at me, puzzled as to why I was even asking them something so obvious. Wordless for the moment, all I could do was shake my head.
If that was the case, shouldn’t the guys just fuck each other and when they are ready for intimacy and love, friendship and family, go out and pursue a girl? Wouldn’t that make more sense then?
From the beginning of written history, men have found pleasure in one another for various reasons. Women and sex, family and love came secondary to pleasuring themselves. I sit at my desk tonight thinking about all the women of the world who try to grab their male partner’s attention and who fail in most every attempt. It seems to me that for any woman who learns that she is perceived merely as being a ‘hole’ by the guy whose attention she’s trying to capture, should give up trying immediately, forevermore.