Tuesday 5 April, 2011Wag more, bark less

I've been working with a couple of people who are having difficulty making good connections with other people.  One of the people has an ad that says he's really lonely and has been lonely since his girlfriend left him 2 years ago and he misses her every day.  Seriously, who's going to contact someone who's looking at their past and letting that define who they are?  Nobody, that's who!

That's where the first quote comes in.  “You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time.”   If you want a great future, look in that direction!

"Wag more, bark less."

I learned this from my dog Charlie who is always happy and always living in the moment. He doesn't get bogged down with he said she said - he just wags and loves everyone. If we could all be more like Charlie life would be a lot simpler and way more peaceful.  Don't be so quick to complain about little stuff. 

The other person I've been trying to help is a woman who is certain that nearly every man or woman on SexyAds that she comes in contact with is out to hurt her.  If she posts in the forum and someone posts under her, they're taking her thunder.  If someone doesn't post under her, they're making her look stupid.  If she enters chat and someone doesn't acknowledge her right away, they're insulting her.  I did my best to explain that none of these things is an insult and with that attitude she was going to piss people off before they got a chance to know her.

She replied that she'd try really hard to chill out but that she had a new problem.  She was very angry that a guy from India came into the chatroom and was insulting to women and why weren't we doing more to prevent that.

We have always had a problem with young men from parts of the world where women are not treated as equal human beings.  They visit a chatroom where western women are and they assume that because the women are talking with strange men, aren't sweeping the floors or aren't waiting on their husbands that they're whores and they talk to them just that way.

We do delete these people but too often it's easier to rush to judge someone for being a real pain in the ass when in actuality they just don't know any better.